REALLY PRETTY IMMATURE IF YOU THINK
Do you gawk at all the worst disasters of human fault
and have the wrong reaction? Join the club. I’m so anti-
disgust that amazement wells in me like a sentimental
James Bond villain. Hey, this is some pure-ass poetry of
witness, babe. Am I worse than the president hustling for
LeBron to join the Bulls? After the time for that line to make
sense has long passed, this pit in Turkmenistan will still be
on fire, a natural gas cavern sparked up by the Soviets.
Drilling rig trips? Fumes leak? Hey, let’s make a perennial
birthday cake out of that shit. Bagpipes scare ducks, but
marches need echoes. In Sidoarjo, they train swimmers
to become swamp creatures. In the Berkeley Pit, a lake of
copper and acid decorates itself with passing snow geese.
On Pududu Island is the only blue pepper, but that’s all
natural, e.g. innocent. Sure you’ve seen a few camels
mount boats, aridity parables, and maybe you’re waiting
for this poem to undress, show you its neon welts, melt into a
straight face, like a number you can call to save the woman
cooking circuit boards. For scrap. For nothing. For hours.
My problem with documentary is all these clunky-ass
prepositions, man. I mean, in Centralia, Pennsylvania,
decades of underground coal fires cause holes to open in
backyards and kids to whoopsie their way on down.
That’s so tragic you don’t even need a roster! We are so
weird. There’s a potato under my sink. None of my shadows
are to scale. In my defense, your honor, everyone you’re
sweet about will whoopsie too. Which is by far the most
boring point I could have made, which is why I will never
be hired to pilot the cradle delivery spaceship, but holy shit!
Gimme a chainsaw and a life’s worth of cactus, and I promise
to tell everything apart, just like I do when we’re together.
Mike Young is the author of We Are All Good If They Try Hard Enough (PGP 2010), a book of poems, and Look! Look! Feathers (Word Riot Press 2011), a book of stories. He co-edits NOÖ Journal and Magic Helicopter Press. Visit him online at http://mikeayoung.blogspot.com.